The 2026 Cheltenham Festival nearly starts in Wales as an overzealous attendant attempts to park my car in Christian Williams' rear bumper.
It’s an inauspicious beginning to the best week in racing and I immediately get flashbacks to last year’s car parking crisis.
Thankfully, Christian doesn’t seem to notice the sardine-like proximity of the bonnet and smiles a cheerful hello, leaving me to carefully weave my way through the surging mass of tweed heading towards the front entrance.
Five cups of tea follow to ensure full functionality and I’m Supreme ready.
En route to hearing the Roar™ in real-time, my path is blocked by a group of five men, engaged in the type of serious debate only unlocked by five pints of Guinness.
“If we don’t see this race, we won’t see anything,” says the leader. “So let’s get this one in the bank so we can say we’ve seen some racing".
It’s a commendable attitude and one I can get on board with.
Unfortunately, the plan to watch the Sky Bet Supreme Novices’ Hurdle in-person requires stilts and/or stepladder for the vertically challenged and I slink off reluctantly to find a big screen.
It proves a worthwhile endeavour as the Brits get off to a flying, and somewhat unexpected, start to the Prestbury Cup. Nicky Henderson has been the only trainer capable of overturning the Irish attack in the Supreme in recent years – he repelled the raiders with Shishkin in 2020 and Constitution Hill in 2022.
The stable’s representative Old Park Star may have been favourite but Henderson’s nervy comments about the danger of El Cairos had favourite backers worried on Monday, and the looming presence of Jack Kennedy aboard the Irish threat promised an early upset.
We shouldn’t have panicked. El Cairos’ seemingly devastating turn of foot was dulled by the strong pace set by Sober Glory and Old Park Star romps past the long-term leader to bring home a one-two-three-four for the Brits. That’s right, one-two-three-four.
A neat summing up from Henderson follows.
"There is no better race to get in the bag, and everybody knows that.”
One-nil to the Brits.
A late mistake by Lulamba and an Irish McCoys Contractors Juvenile Handicap Hurdle-shaped birthday present for JP McManus put us behind again, yet all is not lost.
Enter Jonjo and AJ O’Neill with the indefatigable Johnnywho. A wind operation and the application of first-time cheekpieces has revitalised last year’s Kim Muir second and he’s feeling like an Ultima victory.
AJ isn’t one to shy away from a smile and his grin nearly broke the cameras in the winner’s enclosure.
“It is fantastic to get my first Cheltenham Festival winner since joining Dad on the licence and Richie gave him an unbelievable ride,” he says. “He has threatened to land a big one a couple of times and it is great to do it here."
Jagwar finishes second, earning his ticket for the Grand National, Quebecois places third and Blow Your Wad nearly upsets the party with a late charge to finish fourth.
Except they’re all Brits and there’s no party to upset. That’s another one-two-three-four – do these count for anything?
We ignore the Champion Hurdle – eye roll, Irish domination – and get back to business with Madara in the Sun Racing Plate Handicap Chase.
For the Cheltenham Preview panel circuit afficionado, Madara had been well-touted for the Dan Skelton team to get the job done and Harry Skelton’s knowing smile when asked for a horse-to-follow on a preview video belied the stable confidence.
Six of the first seven home in the Plate may have been Irish-trained, but thankfully the right one was in front.
Dan Skelton echoes similar sentiments to Nicky Henderson earlier in the day, with the palpable relief of a winner on the board.
"It is lovely to get a winner as that is what we all come for,” he says. “If you said to me last night if we can get one then we will ask for more, but one is what is about, especially on day one as everyone can breathe a bit easier.”
Three-all.
It’s too much to hope for, as the field parade for the National Hunt Challenge Cup. Yes, we have fancied runners but Emmet Mullins wields Backmersackme and Gordon Elliott is double-handed in his search for a first winner of this year’s Festival.
How wrong could we be. Holloway Queen, who had relished swamp-like conditions at Newbury, was unfancied to follow up on a different surface but had thankfully forgot to pack her going stick. Ridden by James Bowen, the mare jumped like the proverbial stag and hit the front before the second-last, bringing home a British one-two-three.
Four-three in the Prestbury Cup and a double for Seven Barrows – who needs Lulamba or Constitution Hill, anyway?
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